The Land of Farten-Burrrpen

Chapter Four

And so Mr FartenFurter moved into the Cottage with his three Companions from whom he Could-Not-Be-Parted.

Now, on the other side of the Trees there was another Little Cottage where lived a Pair of Siblings. The Moilys. There was the sister, Burrrpen-Moily. And there was the brother, Mean-Moily.

Why, you ask, would parents name their only son MEAN? And a very good question that is.

You see, when Mean-Moily was born, he came out of his Mother’s OOmb with a Grim-Achy look on his Face. And it was such a Horrific Look, that his Father couldn’t help but say, “Goodness Gracious! What a Mean Looking Totter that be’s!”

And so-ly and thus-ly, the child came to be called Mean-Moily. For the Parents were Mr & Mrs Moily of Whatchamaycallit Cottage.

One day, Mr FartenFurter, who was reclining in a Hammock slung between the Trees, while Fart’n’Fart waxed eloquent between the netting of the Hammock itself, Smelt a Strange Smell.

Now living in The Land of Whooooops!, Mr FartenFurter had become used to Waftings of some Rather Extraordinary Natures. For example, there was DingleBerry whose Whooooops! smelt of Strawberries. And there was PinkleFloss who Exuded Pineapple.

But now, all of a Sudden, Mr FartenFurter smelt Something that he had never smelt before! It was Exciting! What, oh what, could it be???

He carefully got down from the Hammock. He talked to Foot and Foot-Foot and they agreed they had to Get To The Bottom of this Mystery.

He walked Through the Trees. He walked Around the Trees. And Spotted another Little Cottage. He could Swear the Enticing Smell was coming from Somewhere There.

He Approached the Little Cottage and politely asked Fart’n’Fart to announce his presence.

Fart’n’Fart lived up to his reputation and let out such a Roar that once again, the Trees Trembled and Shivered. But they were used to him by now and did NOT let down their Leaves.

Hearing the Commotion, a member of the Female Persuasion appeared from within the Little Cottage.

“Excuse me please, but Who Might You Be?” she asked politely.

“I am Mr FartenFurter, Mayor of this, The Land of Whooooops!”, quoth the Lumbersome gent.

“Ooooh! I’ve HEARD about you. I never thought I’d SEE you!” said the maid.

“And who might YOU be?” quoth our Hero.

“Myself Burrrpen-Moily”, she said.

And thus our two protagonists met, Among the Trees as the Butterflies Hovered Overhead.

(A Moment of Silence, please, for the imagined Look that was exchanged among the Would-Be Bosom Companions.)

Chapter Five coming soon…..

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