The Land of Farten-Burrrpen

Chapter Seven

And so, while Mr FartenFurter Whiled Away his Time Sleeping and Thinking, what was Happening down at Whatchamaycallit Cottage?

Well, in the same MeanWhile, Ms Burrrpen Moily was in a Similar State of Flux. She did not Know What Had Hit Her.

But she felt as if a Big Whoooooooooosh! had come and Knocked her off her Feet!

She did not know What to Think! For though she was standing on her feet, and though Nothing and Nobody had Knocked her, she still felt totally KNOCKED!

Her brother, Mean, came through the Woods and found her standing at the gate of the Cottage, Mouth Wide Open, with Not A Whooooops! around!

He was Scared! He ran for his Mother. And he ran for his Father!

“Amma! Appa! Something happen to Burrrpie! Come phast! Come phast!”

And his mother and his father ran to the Cottage from different directions (they had been out gathering Wood for the Stove).

“Burrrpie! Burrrpie! Aiyo Burrrpie!” cried Amma Moily, falling to her haunches in front of Burrrpen and weeping.

“Burrrpie! Ki holo Burrrpie?” cried Appa Moily, who had travelled to Different Lands and picked up Different Languages. Some of which he wore on his Vest.

He shook young Burrrpen. He slapped young Burrrpen. And suddenly there was a Tremendous Rumbling and a Gigantic Whoooooooooops! Erupted from Ms Burrrpen Moily’s mouth and she Came To Her Senses.

“Where, O Where Am I?” she cried piteously.

“But you is at HOME, Burrrpie!” cried Amma Moily rocking back and forth on her Heels.

“What, O What Has Happen To ME?” cried Burrrpen even more piteously.

“What has happen, Burrrpie? Oh tell us, but what has happen?” cried her father.

“I don’t know,” said the maiden. “The wonly thing I be knowing is that the Mayor be coming. I be looking at Him. He be looking at Me. We be Talking Little Little. He be going. I be watching Him Going. And Going. And Gone. Then you be slapping and shaking me Appa!”

Appa Moily looked at Amma Moily. Amma Moily looked at Mean Moily. Mean Moily looked at Appa Moily. And all three Burst Out Laughing at the same Time.

“What has happen? What has happen? Tell me! Oh, somebody tell me!” cried Burrrpen pitiably.

“I be thinking,” said her brother, Mean, with a Grim-Achy look on his Face. “I be thinking, Burrrpie, that you be FALLING IN LAU!”

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